Notes

Outline

Does Competition Build Kids’ Self Esteem? First Annual CHADD Golf Tournament May 14, 2001 Ijamsville, MD

Does Competition Build Kids’ Self Esteem?

Is a Crocodile a Golf Hazard? Hit the ball anyway? (You like wildlife) Take a penalty? Repeat the shot  from the previous position? Other?

Healthy Narcissism (Good self esteem) Positive sense of self Realistic appraisal of of inner strengths and weaknesses Frustration (losing) is tolerable

Unhealthy Narcissism Rigid, brittle sense of self worth Tendency to blame others Needs frequent wins or compliments

What Does It Mean to Compete? The possibility of a win or a loss. The winning goal may be external or internal.

Is Competition Good For Our Kids? Sports Academics Between Family Members Within the Self

How Sports Can Help Physical activity may be a release for the active child Child with academic challenges might shine in sports. Teaches social skills and fair play Fosters a sense of group identity

Sports and the Less Coordinated AD/HD Child Sports can be another source of humiliation Being publicly chosen last Teasing by teammates Student may withdraw or act out.

How we can help this student Parents should discuss strengths and weaknesses with teachers and coaches. Find sports where competition is more individualized. Find an instructor who has a commitment to train the less talented athlete. Extra lessons or extra time with coach.

Competition in the Classroom May provide extra excitement and interest May make student feel like a failure.

When Competition is a Problem    Certain individuals may have more difficulty tolerating competition

The sensitive, depressed child Children with AD/HD have a higher incidence of depression Competition may seem hopeless. Loss seems inevitable. When loss does occur, it reinforces low self image.

The Socially Awkward Child This child may misinterpret cues. Inattentiveness can exacerbate social errors More likely to end up as victim.

Social Phobia Individuals with AD/HD have a higher incidence of anxiety. Fear of public performance.

Impulsive Child Takes competition too far. May become over stimulated Breaks rules. Understands what to do but cannot stop self

Misinterprets competition as assault Misreads social cues Cultural differences Traumatic past experiences. Impulsivity

Narcissistic Child If a parent feels that his child is defective in one area, he may insist that the child make it up to him by excelling in another area Child may feel that he has the right to win at any cost Parents must model a healthy attitude toward competition in class and on the field.

Medical Care costs more for kids with AD/HD $1944—Median medical cost for non-AD/HD child $4356—Median cost for child with AD/HD The use and costs of medical care for children and adolescents with and without Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. JAMA Jan. 3, 2001.

Sibling Rivalry Moderate sibling rivalry can teach competition in a supportive place. Severe rivalry sets the stage for problems outside the home

Is competition helpful to Kids with AD/HD?